Home > Life, Travel > In the bleak midwinter

In the bleak midwinter

Or, at least, in the mildly promising mid-December.

I’m still working, still in love, still alive, although my recent blog productivity would indicate a lack of living.

By this stage, Habiba and I know each other pretty well, but I think we’re still learning about each other. A case in point is last weekend. My friend and colleague (and erstwhile language exchange partner), Ji-hyeon, had a gig, a kind of battle of the bands thing last Saturday. Her first, I believe. Habiba and I, and Botond went along to see her.

However, earlier in the day, I left Habiba at home talking to her sister over Skype. From her response when I said goodbye, I could tell she was a bit miffed by the abruptness of my leaving, and that she probably wanted to hang out at home. For my part, being up and awake and having various things I could usefully work on and with Habiba busy doing something else I wanted to head out to my office (aka Starbucks). And Habiba knew that that was what I was going to do.

I tried not think about it. I did some work on the roleplaying game I’m designing. When I met Habiba later with Bo, she didn’t talk to me much, so I just left her alone. Once Ji-hyeon had played, her band being fourth out of six, I told her we were leaving. We said bye to Bo and went home and then Habiba and I talked about the problem (she doesn’t like the word ‘problem’, but it’s my blog, I choose the words).

She said she wanted me to address it earlier, more directly, and in the end she wasn’t too upset with me.

Tonight – now, in fact – we went out to see a production involving a friend of hers’ boyfriend. It was a daft, Korean-style comedy, with lots of audience participation; very un-play-like, in fact. More like a night out at a bar with some actors in the crowd. I wasn’t into it and when I told Habiba I wanted to leave she got a bit huffy. So I turned her round to face me and told her not to be upset and that it just wasn’t my thing.

This cheered her up immensely and we kissed and said icky things to each other with which I won’t embarrass you. And I came to do my own thing.

In a week we’ll be in Thailand for a week. I have a feeling I’ll have more opportunities to practise my relationship-based assertiveness. But I think there won’t be too many of those.

On Saturday 26 th, we’re going to Bangkok (via China) for a few days, then Ko Phi Phi by bus (probably) for New Year’s then back up to Bangkok by plane from Phuket. Our stop in China on the way back to Korea is ridiculously long. We’re back in Korea on Sunday 3rd.

We left a lot of the planning too late, really. We have places to stay in Bangkok and Phi Phi Island, although the latter looks decidedly dodgy in terms of quality of stay. We found various comments about it being terribly noisy – after we made the booking. There weren’t many alternatives available to us, so we’re aware that we’ve made our bed and must now lie in it.

I don’t want to be negative, but I think there are going to be lots of stesses ahead of us in Thailand. Hopefully, by being mentally prepared for the worst, the worst won’t seem too bad.

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Categories: Life, Travel
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